Internal

It's hurtful enough to see her with another man, but haven't I suffered enough. My body aches just listening to her voice wandering across the room, I can't ignore her neither can I talk to her, but what the fuck is holding me back. No ones stopping me but I can't allow myself to get hurt again. I don't understand why I purposely continue on like this I'm lying, betraying my body, and having my inner self ripped apart because of her. But what can I do? why is it so hard? why am I so attached to her? why is it that whenever I think for myself her face would always creep into my mind intruding my privacy and my personal thoughts. She's annoying, senseless, insecure, and God just AHHH!! so why do I still like her(talk about the dumbest attributes for a girl) for God sakes not even porn can take my mind off her. Its irritating enough just talking and thinking about her, I can't allow this conflict to suffocate me and my friends anymore. It's gone far enough its time for me to take a stand she has to lose this has to stop. Where the fuck is my resolve.